The Scoop

Here’s the scoop.
No Shit, yesterday was a public holiday, hence why no response. Anyway, here is Andy’s unbiased take on the events of the past few weeks.
Newcastle finished a disappointing 5th in the league last season, mostly due the a lack of transfer activity (for example Chelsea spent £100Million on new players…we spent nowt) and some bizarre team selections by the elderly Sir Bobby Robson.
Close season: Newcastle Chairman Freddy Shepard publicly announces that the upcoming seasons (2004-5) will be the 71 yr old Bobby Robsons Last before his retirement. Nothing unique in that you might think, except that wasn’t Bobby’s decision, it was Freddy’s.
This, in my humble opinion, is where the wheels began to fall off. This announcement had one effect, and one effect only, but was significant enough to lead to Uncle Bobby’s demise as manager: it undermined his authority with the players in the dressing room.
The Chairman and manager tried to move forward through the close season. A number of high profile (and overly expensive) new players were signed to appease the fans unrest. In came: James Milner from Leed Utd (£3.5 million), Stephen Carr from Tottenham (£4million), Nicky Butt from Manchester Utd (£4million) and most notably the dutch scoring legend (and alleged rapist!) Patrick Kluivert from Barcelona (Apparently on £100,000 per week!).
Far from easing the ship this final signing only rocked worse than ever! Newcastles legendary number 9 (king) Alan Shearer is also in his last season before retiring, this time as a player. This time however it was Alan’s decision and has been known for about 1 yr. However, preseason, after the signing of Kluivert, Shearer gives a blunt warning to both Bobby and Kluivert, thinly disguised as a battle cry for the upcoming season, by announcing something like : “this is my last season as a Newcastle United player. I want it to be my best and the break Newcastle All time scoring records. I can’t do that if I’m sitting on the bench” ….because some dutch rapist is on the field in his place. For those of you who don’t know Alan Shearer IS Newcastle Utd. He is a one man legend. He has plotted, and succeeded, in overthrowing TWO previous Newcastle Managers of some repute: Firstly Liverpool and Scotland Legend Kenny Dalgleish, secondly the original role model for Patrick Kluivert, Ruud Gullit. Bobby is wondering how to handle this.
The 2004-5 Season begins: Kluivert is on the bench, Shearer is on the field. A new problem emerges: Kieron Dyer. Ass you will know from previous Bloggs, Kieron Dyer was one of Sir Bob’s first ever signings five years ago. He was hailed as a wonder kid, just 18 yrs of age and already knocking on the door of the full England squad. What a promising talent. However, during his five year stint at Newcastle he has not progressed, in fact…he’s shit. He does still get paid a hell of a lot of money though, and drives round in a bling-ass car and is seen to be dripping in ice. Anyway, at this first game of the season Kieron is asked by Sir Bobby to play wide on the right. He refuses. What? How can he refuse?! He get’s paid thousand to do what the manager tells him to do. The manager is 71, has enormous experience and is respected around the world. Kieron is just some underachieving jumped up little bling-prick. He refuses. Bobby explodes and dumps him from the team altogether. However that is not the end of the story. As I mentioned earlier this was just another signal that the lovable old Uncle Bobby Robson was not in control of his players.
Newcastle play another coulpe of games and we have so far failed to win anything this season. I went to the Norwich game last Wednesday and deafened by the booing from the crowd. Shearer was playing again and did nowt. The white hankies came out at the end f the game as the players trooped off…(White hankies signal the fans want a change of management)
Uncle Bobby sucks it up and faces the media. He annouces changes ahead for this satrudays away game at Aston Villa, that HE is the manager, that HE is in charge,. And that team selection and tactics is HIS job. He’s been in this situation before, many times, and has toughed it out.
Saturday comes and the tem sheet is annouced. BOMBSHELL! Shearer is dropped, Kluivert takes his place from the start. Kieron is nowhere to even be seen. A brave move by Bobby and althought Kluiver did score, a stupid one. We lost 4-2.
Next day: Bobby’s gone.

Althought, from a fans point of view, I believed drastic changes were needed including a new manager; I am somewhat saddened by the way all this came about. Bobby is a true Gentleman, a local hero, a Knight of the realm, and one of the best managers this country has EVER produced….ever. So, for him to lose his job, at his beloved hometown club, in his final year before a proud and deserved retirement is hard to swallow. But, what really sticks in my throat though is that it mostly came about because of the Kieron Dyer incident. Dyer is a little upstart, a shit who has gone off the boil and can only dream of being as well repsected as Bobby Robson, and for him to have one of the decisive effects on this whole affair (regardless of the fact it was unintentional) really gets my goat. And not just me. Reaction in the local news has been strongly anti-Dyer, and the player will most likely never play for Newcatle again, or be able to live in the area due to the hatred now focused on him.

Initial names being throuwn around as a replace include an apprent ‘dream team’ of ex-England manager Terry Venables to be joined by Alan Shearer at the end of the season. Fake Geordie Steve Bruce, currently at Birmingham city and just signed a new two year deal. Martin O’Neill of Celtic would be fantastic, but he’s never coming to Newcastle whenhe can hang on a couple of years and take over the reins at the biggest football club in the world, Manchester Utd. Wee Ginger Whinger Gordon Strachan is another choice, but for me, he lacks a viable connection to the club and the geordie nation. My choices (if we coulnd’t get O’Neill) would be Ex-Striking God and current Wales Boss, Mark “Sparky” Hughes. A born leader on the pitch during his playign days, and strict disciplinarian off it.

Watch this space.